Learning Dutch for children who came to the Netherlands from another country is enriching in so many ways.

It is a shame that our son wants to leave field hockey. When we moved here a year ago, we thought it would be fun for him to get to know Dutch kids his age. We emigrated for my work, and we feel it is important for us as a family to integrate into the host country.

This mother came to us and told us that the international school’s Dutch lessons were insufficient. The lessons do not have enough learning hours for students to relax and talk with peers. Mason* has now had two months of lessons with us. He has continued to play field hockey (at his father’s insistence) at his club and is starting to come home more enthusiastic again about his sport.

We started the lessons by briefly repeating some basics of the Dutch language, as he had had this but had never practiced it further. Then, the teacher quickly moved on to field hockey language! Focusing on vocabulary, sentences, question-answers, coach’s instructions, responding to instructions, responding to reactions from teammates (friendly and not so friendly😅), and locker room vocabulary and sentences.

It seems that Mason will continue to play field hockey and stay with us to become more proficient in Dutch in other areas.

The guilt I felt about transferring my child again to another country

I felt a stab in my heart a couple of years ago when my son came home upset. He returned from his first day of school in our new host country. His classmates bullied him because he did not understand the language of the established group. Oh, how guilty I felt that we had moved again, and he had to go through this all over. That evening, I cried myself to sleep.

This is 8 years ago, but I still can understand what we went through. We have learned so much since. I couldn’t learn him that language, a great friend could and did..

Learning Dutch to understand the culture helps!

Learning Dutch as a new language is not only about the language but also about the social rules between children and teens and the Dutch culture behind those rules.

How do you handle social situations at school, in the classroom, on the sports field, and in everyday life in the Netherlands? How do groups of children develop and interact, and how are you supposed to behave?

Long before the current era, different groups and cultures settled in the Netherlands. This has influenced our culture greatly in fashion, cuisine, sports, celebrations, and even home decor. Over time, many customs and objects that originated abroad have become embedded in Dutch culture to the point where they are now considered truly Dutch, says ethnologist Hester Dibbits from the Meertens Institute.

Strangely, we see this in clothes, slang, and music but less intolerance or respect for international children. The first things our children noticed after living abroad were:

• The bold and direct way of communicating.
• The narrow view of their world or better of only the Netherlands
• American and British pop culture.

This differs most probably from your home culture. Please note that every person is different—sender and receiver. So, your experience may vary from their experience and the ‘general’ basics..

Learning Dutch: The basics of the Dutch culture are essential for your child

1. Within the Dutch children’s heads: values, attitudes, representations. A significant value here is, for example, ‘freedom’. This may come over as free-spirited or debauched, but the underlying value is the freedom we fought for.
2. What your child experiences on the outside. For example, how children in the Netherlands wear their hair or react to different hairstyles, or what kind of soda is in and which is out.
3. How behavior is regulated in the Netherlands. For example, the rules of respect are in a group of teens in the Netherlands.

Not knowing enough of the language of your host country, including the unwritten rules, puts your child at a disadvantage when playing sports, attending Dutch school, and making new Dutch friends..

”I want my child to be confident enough to play field hockey, too!”

Let us help your children feel safe and confident enough to participate in sports and hobbies or socialize with Dutch classmates and peers. If you also want this for your son or daughter, please email us at info@dutchforchildren.nl. I, Wendy van Dalen, the founder of Dutch for Children, will look at the possibilities with you.